Spells for others

Recently I was contacted online by someone looking for a love spell.  This individual was someone I had never met.  I was immediately on guard and asked several questions.  When the answers came back, I had more questions and the conversation continued back and forth.  My gut wasn't feeling overly positive and the desperation of the individual was bordering on stalker-level.  In the end, I politely declined and wished him well.  I did add that I did not believe a spell was the answer.  I encouraged him to court her, charm her, and to let it fall together naturally.

In the past, I've been asked to help with various spells.  Some have been other pagans wanting advice or assistance on their spellwork and I have both complied and declined. There have been others - both pagan and not - wanting me to perform spells for them.  Again, I have both agreed and refrained. I have written a few spells with instructions and a list of tools and objects for a couple of people.  Some of these have even been love spells.

Why some and not others?  It's a personal thing.  I don't feel comfortable assisting a stranger by performing a spell for them or providing a spell to them.  If I know someone, I'm open to conversation about the rationale behind their spellwork and, if my instinct doesn't object, helping them finesse a spell.

The individual who asked for a love spell most recently didn't give me what I needed to hear in order to even consider helping him with a love spell in any way.  Would I have considered it if our conversation had gone another way?  Probably not, especially with a love spell.

As a Grey Witch, I'm not all about the Rede.  I am governed by my own personal ethics and values. Manipulation of others is not in my comfort zone but...sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do.  I am always sure of my motivation, my intention, and all my potential consequences.

In my personal practice, I don't do a lot of spellwork as far as planning, writing the words, collecting my tools, checking correspondence, etc.  Most of my spellwork would fall under the heading of chants or prayers.  It is also very natural in creation and practice.  I have and will go all out with spells but only when I feel it is truly necessary.  My magick and spellwork are excellent reflections of my practice.