Focus round one, part two

Why do I feel I need to be proficient at something "witchy"?  Will it prove my status within my community?  Will it prove to be worthwhile?  Can it make me a more valuable witch?

Nope.  Nah.  And no.

So why do I want to do it?  I realized something...I don't.

I do want to get better at numerology so I could go without a cheat sheet and still give people a bit of information.  And I want them to know I can work at getting them a more detailed report with some time.  I'm not going to claim to be a master at it, but I am going to consider it something that I can and will do.

As for the rocks...that's what reference materials are for.  I do want to learn some stones that are good for specific things - the common needs so I can have that information without needing to reference a book or website.  I'd also like to know multiple properties on the more common stones that are easy to find for purchase.

It's good enough for me.  I don't have to be a master.  I am truly confident in myself, my abilities, and my achievements.  I only need to improve upon myself and be better than I was the day before.  There's no one I need to or want to impress.

Blog prompts

Starting in April, I'm going to use blog prompts from The Pagan Experience.  Check them out if you are interested.

Elemental colored pinwheels for Spring

Focus, round 1

I'm and eclectic pagan with lots of bits and pieces of information jammed in my brain.  I know a lot of things but nothing would I consider myself to be an expert at, heck, not even proficient.  That is going to change.

First, I've always been interested in stones - regular stones you find in the alley, crystals, gems, etc. - but I've never really studied them.  Yes, I have reference books to gather meanings and descriptions but I really want to work on getting a better knowledge base of stones.  This is the first focus area.

Second, would be my love of Numerology.  I have the basics of how to establish your numbers and can then reference what that all means.  I want to be able to know it and do readings without an aid.  I've taught a class on basic Numerology so I'm hopeful my lesson plan for that class will provide the basis for my study.  Also, since Numerology has so many different numbers, I'm going to start my focus on the Core numbers:

• Life or Birth Path number
• Expression, Personality, or Destiny number
• Soul Urge or Heart's Desire number
• Birthday number

So Numerology is my second focus area.

I shall begin working on both of those promptly and I expect my blog will reflect that.  It's a good place to start.

Prayer

Shortly after my husband and I separated and I moved to Omaha (September 2014), I began reciting a nightly prayer for my kids. It was my way of staying connected to and with them.  Here it is:

Zayne and Kyah - my stepkids

"By Earth, by Air, by Fire and Water

Please protect my son and daughter.

Keep them safe throughout the night,

Waking them gently when the time is right. 

Wrap them securely in the light of my love,

Protecting them from harm, both below and above  

Never let them doubt how much they mean to me,

For as I will it, so more it be". 

After my daughter passed away (January 2016), I needed to change it. My nightly prayer for my son remained the same with a few changes in the wording. 

"By Land, by Wind, by Flame and Rain

Please protect my amazing son Zayne.

Keep him safe throughout the night,

Waking him gently when the time is right. 

Wrap him securely in the light of my love,

Protecting him from harm, both below and above  

Never let him doubt how much he means to me,

For as I will it, so more it be". 

I've been struggling to write something for my daughter so I've been using the original prayer and modifying it for a single person and using feminine pronouns. But it doesn't quite fit so I'll be coming up with something - hopefully - soon. 

Nightly prayers are something of a comfort to me. I remember praying before bed as a child. My most vivid memory of nightly prayer comes from my paternal grandmother. She would pray every night, say a rosary, and read some from the bible. It was beautiful to watch her transform as she worked through her bedtime prayer routine. 

Besides the prayers for the kids, I often toss out a few other requests for those I love and hold most dear. Generally it's just a request that they be loved and protected and find peace. Occasionally I will offer up some love for someone I've never met but have heard could use a boost. This could be from a news report, word-of-mouth, or a donor I've spoken with at work. 

As I write this, I realize that I don't pray for myself. As per typical Shanda fashion, my focus and concern is for others.  This is something I plan to actively work at changing because I need the love and support too.