Animals

I've always loved animals...well, most animals.  And although I've never done anything to directly find my spirit animal(s)/animal guide(s), I've felt connections to certain animals.  Made sense to list them out and then do a bit of digging into their meanings.  So, for now, the list:

• Panda
• Polar bear
• Bear
• Snow Leopard
• Gorilla
• Cow
• Turtle
• Frog
• Manatee
• Elephant
• Giraffe
• Otter
• Dog/Wolf/Canine
• Seal/Sea Lion

Looking at my list, most are Earth animals with a few Water animals tossed in.  Considering I'm most affiliated with those elements and affectionately call myself Mud, it makes sense.  I would like to find a connection to an Air and Fire animal or two, but we shall see.  Just off the top of my head, Air animals I am curious about would be Owl and Cardinal and Fire animals could be Salamanders and certain Lizards.

Ár nDraíocht Féin: A Druid Fellowship (ADF)

Guess who joined ADF?  ME!

Focus round one, part two

Why do I feel I need to be proficient at something "witchy"?  Will it prove my status within my community?  Will it prove to be worthwhile?  Can it make me a more valuable witch?

Nope.  Nah.  And no.

So why do I want to do it?  I realized something...I don't.

I do want to get better at numerology so I could go without a cheat sheet and still give people a bit of information.  And I want them to know I can work at getting them a more detailed report with some time.  I'm not going to claim to be a master at it, but I am going to consider it something that I can and will do.

As for the rocks...that's what reference materials are for.  I do want to learn some stones that are good for specific things - the common needs so I can have that information without needing to reference a book or website.  I'd also like to know multiple properties on the more common stones that are easy to find for purchase.

It's good enough for me.  I don't have to be a master.  I am truly confident in myself, my abilities, and my achievements.  I only need to improve upon myself and be better than I was the day before.  There's no one I need to or want to impress.

Blog prompts

Starting in April, I'm going to use blog prompts from The Pagan Experience.  Check them out if you are interested.

Elemental colored pinwheels for Spring

Focus, round 1

I'm and eclectic pagan with lots of bits and pieces of information jammed in my brain.  I know a lot of things but nothing would I consider myself to be an expert at, heck, not even proficient.  That is going to change.

First, I've always been interested in stones - regular stones you find in the alley, crystals, gems, etc. - but I've never really studied them.  Yes, I have reference books to gather meanings and descriptions but I really want to work on getting a better knowledge base of stones.  This is the first focus area.

Second, would be my love of Numerology.  I have the basics of how to establish your numbers and can then reference what that all means.  I want to be able to know it and do readings without an aid.  I've taught a class on basic Numerology so I'm hopeful my lesson plan for that class will provide the basis for my study.  Also, since Numerology has so many different numbers, I'm going to start my focus on the Core numbers:

• Life or Birth Path number
• Expression, Personality, or Destiny number
• Soul Urge or Heart's Desire number
• Birthday number

So Numerology is my second focus area.

I shall begin working on both of those promptly and I expect my blog will reflect that.  It's a good place to start.

Prayer

Shortly after my husband and I separated and I moved to Omaha (September 2014), I began reciting a nightly prayer for my kids. It was my way of staying connected to and with them.  Here it is:

Zayne and Kyah - my stepkids

"By Earth, by Air, by Fire and Water

Please protect my son and daughter.

Keep them safe throughout the night,

Waking them gently when the time is right. 

Wrap them securely in the light of my love,

Protecting them from harm, both below and above  

Never let them doubt how much they mean to me,

For as I will it, so more it be". 

After my daughter passed away (January 2016), I needed to change it. My nightly prayer for my son remained the same with a few changes in the wording. 

"By Land, by Wind, by Flame and Rain

Please protect my amazing son Zayne.

Keep him safe throughout the night,

Waking him gently when the time is right. 

Wrap him securely in the light of my love,

Protecting him from harm, both below and above  

Never let him doubt how much he means to me,

For as I will it, so more it be". 

I've been struggling to write something for my daughter so I've been using the original prayer and modifying it for a single person and using feminine pronouns. But it doesn't quite fit so I'll be coming up with something - hopefully - soon. 

Nightly prayers are something of a comfort to me. I remember praying before bed as a child. My most vivid memory of nightly prayer comes from my paternal grandmother. She would pray every night, say a rosary, and read some from the bible. It was beautiful to watch her transform as she worked through her bedtime prayer routine. 

Besides the prayers for the kids, I often toss out a few other requests for those I love and hold most dear. Generally it's just a request that they be loved and protected and find peace. Occasionally I will offer up some love for someone I've never met but have heard could use a boost. This could be from a news report, word-of-mouth, or a donor I've spoken with at work. 

As I write this, I realize that I don't pray for myself. As per typical Shanda fashion, my focus and concern is for others.  This is something I plan to actively work at changing because I need the love and support too. 

Starting up again

I've decided to start blogging again.  I currently have 3 different blogs but am going to do my best to blog weekly - at least - in each blog.  If it comes down to it, my goal is one blog post a week.

For this blog, I've decided to loosely follow prompts from two different programs.  The Pagan Experience is a weekly prompt set up in a month-to-month forum.  Each month has an overall theme and the weekly prompts are arranged with some alphabetical ranges.  Posts are shared weekly on Sundays.

The other program is the Grimoire Challenge on Tumblr.  The prompts are presented weekly will there being writing prompts for most days.  The idea with this challenge is to set up your grimoire by the end of the year into a way that works for your and your workings.

Correspondence

Week 5 - the letter "C" is for Correspondence

Correspondence is another thing that falls into an annoying category within the Pagan community.  At least, annoying to me. 

We've established that there is a ton of information out there from all sorts of sources.  Some info supports other info wile others contradict it.  If you are new to the craft, you could be overwhelmed if you start looking up correspondence for a love spell should you reference different sources.  Which is right?  Which is wrong?  Are any of the answers correct?

I do have correspondence info that I've pulled from different sources and I also have this amazing book, but I also rely on my personal instincts and previous experiences. 

Someone, at some point in time, somewhere, decided that the color red was associated with love and passion.  I'm sure they had their reasons but those may not be the same as mine.  I do related the color red to love and passion but also to blood, courage, and pain.  Correspondence info only works if you believe in it because no matter what anyone has said, you can only do so much magick if you aren't personally invested in the tools and items you are using.

I'm not saying you should totally disregard the generally accepted information out there but make sure that it jives with you.  Question it.  Experiment.  Let your gut give you guidance.  And also know that your selection may change over time or even with each use.

It is part of the process that we grow and change. 

The exception is if you are following a specific tradition.  If that is the case, most traditions have their own correspondence information for the Sabbats, colors, moon phases, elements, etc.   It would be recommended that you abide by your tradition's rules and information.  If something doesn't seem right to you, explore the reasons why you feel this way and then speak to someone - preferably your teacher or mentor - to determine if this can be remedied or if you are to follow that tradition to the letter.

Books

Week 4 - the letter "B" is for Books

(I'm falling behind but this is an attempt to catch up.  Not sure if I will but I am going to keep moving forward.)

Books.  I love them.  I love reading them, purchasing them, smelling them, hoarding them.  But, my Pagan library is somewhat sparse. 

It seems strange since I am such a bibliophile (modern version) but I can explain.  My Pagan books are for learning and increasing my personal knowledge of what I view as my "Shanda-ism".  My Pagan books are for reference and practicality.  Some are very near and dear to my heart, having acquired a sentimental value but most are just tools, much like candles, wands, stones, etc. 

Most are marked up with notes written in the margins.  Many have highlighted passages and pages that have been bent at the corners for a bookmark.  Some are worn and on the verge of falling apart while others are pristine. 

There is so much information out there - published books, websites, online groups, people in real life, stores - that it can be overwhelming.  And the contradiction is crazy. 

My personal belief system is uniquely my own and comes from many different areas.  It is something that I have been working on and building for the past 25+ years.  But early on, it was hard to wade through the information to determine what clicked with me.

One author would have a certain way to perform a Yule celebration while another would have a completely different, if not opposite, description on how he honored the Sabbat.  It was confusing and I was terrified of messing up.  I explored and experimented until something clicked.  Over the years, I've changed and adapted but my books - my go-to books - remain the same. 

I've also found that, unless highly recommended by very trusted and respected sources, I cannot purchase books online.  I need to look through the books to see if the info inside resonates with me and isn't something I have in at least 3 other books and recorded in my Book of Shadows.  The book must serve a purpose.

Because it has also been a while since I was a newbie, I am beyond the basics.  I need to hone my practice in my own way and is focused on trial and error more than anything.  I still love learning new things but I'm becoming more and more set in my ways. 

Books are wonderful and I will carry on a love affair with them for the rest of my days.  But they are meant to be used and enjoyed.  Otherwise, they are just useless chunks of paper, with words splashed upon the pages, and bound together.